My Mother's Day

This year was the first year that I was a mother on Mother's Day. Although Amanda found that quite funny last Saturday, it really wasn't that different for me. As long as you have a mother you still have to do stuff; and now that I'm married there are two mothers to please.

Also, since my child was too young to do anything for me (can't wait to get a picture or some other work of craft), Dan gave me some flowers and a card on her behalf.

Even though we all know that we should appreciate our mothers every day, since most of us don't, it's nice to have a day to remind us.

Speaking of mothers, I recently got into watching Jon & Kate plus Eight about a young couple who have twins and sextuplets. Every time I think looking after one baby is hard enough, I remind myself of her. I bet she thought having twins was tough.

I guess it makes it all worth it when these babies start talking and expressing their own personalities. That's when the real fun begins.

What Parents Want

Did a friend or a family member just give birth and you just can't wait to go the shops and get some cutesy tiny little thing for the cute tiny little bub?

STOP!

And think.

Other friends and family members are also probably just itching to run and buy lots of cute baby stuff so does the new mother and father really need another pretty little frilly dress?

Most likely no.

Here is your chance to come on top of the present buying well-meaning family and friends as the person who actually got something the new parents needed.

I've come up with a small list that might help.

• Most people will get clothes so if you also really want to get some doll outfit, go for the one without buttons on the back as that's the place babies spend their most time on.
  
  
• Also, babies do not need dresses or clothes with lots of frills, ribbons and buttons as they spend most of their time on their backs and just need something comfortable like a soft cotton bodysuit; something they can easily be wrapped in.
  
  
• If you want to get clothes for when they're older, take into account what season it will be when they're older and buy accordingly
  
  
• If you want to get some rattle for when they're little, buy something light as they usually end up being dropped on their faces when the baby gets bored with it.
  
  
• All toys will be put in their mouths so buy something safe
  
  
• Babies do not need 10 teddy bears
  
  
• Newborn babies do not need cute little ballet shoes
  
  
• A baby gym is great! (Even when they're too small for the gym activities, it's a good place for tummy time)
  
  
• Soft/plastic fold out books are great for when they learn to play with toys. Every time the baby moves it, she see a new picture which can occupy her for longer than other toys
  
  
• A baby bath such as Fisher-Price Rainforest Bath Center is useful beyond words
  
  
• Some soothing baby CDs to put them to sleep
  
  
• Anything that will help put the child to sleep
  
  
• Some bright books with nice rhymes
  
  
• A rocker such as this one
  
  
• Toys to tie up to the pram
  
  
• A sleeping bag with sleeves
  
  
• Toys that make noise and do lots of stuff to distract the baby when they're upset
  
  
• A musical mobile (or any mobile) for their cot
  
  
• A musical soother
  
  
• Did I mention anything to calm the baby into sleep?
  
  
• Wraps (for summer or winter) - you never seem to have enough
  
  
• Bibs (for when they start drooling). I liked ones without velcro.
  
  
• And the fail-proof present is just asking what the parents want
  

If you're a parent, what did you find useful?

For Parents Who Worry

If you are a parent, that is probably you.

As a new parent of a baby, I got carried away with seeing how she measures up to all the developmental milestones. Every tiny change that she went through was magnified to humongous proportions - "Did you see that?! She noticed a toy!!! She's never done that before! Isn't that amazing?! She's so smart!"

So when I noticed that many babies her age were rolling over, I started to get worried. I saw in some random poll asking parents when their babies first rolled over, the majority said four months. When she turned four, I was thinking "Why is my baby behind?!" even though of course she wasn't. I guess I saw anything above average as being behind.

Then I got carried away and read about babies who never rolled over and went straight to sitting which made me think, "Maybe Caitlyn is just too smart for rolling over. She's way above that silly nonsense".

I also read about parents worried that their eight month old still couldn't sit and a one year old who couldn't walk. Skimming through many parents' stories, I stumbled on one lady's comment, "My son couldn't sit until he was 9 months and couldn't walk until he was 18 months. He's 25 now and sits and walks just fine".

Now I have the whole baby development in perspective.

And to my surprise two days ago, Caitlyn rolled over. She has been repeating this manoeuvre ever since.

Popular Baby-sitter

Caitlyn has not been as easy as she once was. She has been cranky and unable to be alone even for a minute, making it very difficult for me to do basic tasks such as brushing my teeth and taking a shower.

Personally, I think she has been getting bored because her cranky cries quickly turn to big smiles once I play something new with her. I searched on the internet for what other parents do to keep their babies occupied. I was surprised (even shocked to read) many gems such as "my 4 month old loves Disney cartoons. I just plop him in front of the TV and he can be entertained long enough for him to fall asleep".

Oh. My. God.

A four month old loves Disney? Does a four month old even understand what Disney is?!

Of course I understand that this clever mother probably meant that he was entertained by the colourful moving images but since when does a TV become a baby's nanny? Do these parents who use the TV so readily for babies even realise the damage it is doing to their poor babies' eyes? Why damage their eye sight so early in life when they can do it quite quickly when they're older?

To read that parents use the TV to entertain their babies (like it's a miracle cure for their need for stimulation) has really disturbed me. I guess I'll attribute this to their plain ignorance and not that they are too lazy to play with their kids.

No one said kids were easy to look after so if you made the decision to have them, you have to nurture them and not find quick fixes that make it easy for you, while not benefiting the kids in the slightest.

Dreaming of Good Sleep

No one can ever possibly appreciate to a full extent an uninterrupted 8 hours of solid deep sleep and a slow awakening until they have a baby.

Sure you've probably had several nights in a row of little or no sleep but you always managed to have a restful long sleep to make up for it. Right?

With a small baby, the concept of good sleep is almost impossible. Sure it got better once Caitlyn stopped needing the night-time feed. However, that didn't stop her from waking me for other reasons, even if it was to give me a huge squealing grin. Yep, at 3am in the morning.

The best thing we did was hire a bassinet to put near our bed (as our room is too small to fit her cot). I don't actually have to get out of bed anymore to give her my full attention. Next week this bassinet has to be returned. I don't know what I will do, maybe squeeze a fold-out bed next to her cot?

I was hoping she'd be able to not wake in the middle of the night by this stage (as she has done on several occasions) but I'm not counting on it.

My mind has suffered, especially my memory. Only a few weeks ago, I was telling Dan how I thought my grandma losing her memory because she was telling me the same stories over and over again, to which Dan replied, "You already told me that."

Is My Baby Normal?

That is a question I'm sure a lot of parents ask.

It usually starts with "Is my baby putting on enough weight?", and can then be followed by many others such as "Why is my baby so big?", "Why does my baby still not sleep through the night?" and a favourite "Why is my baby crying now?!"

Unfortunately I cannot answer all of them and how many times have we heard, "All babies are different" anyway?

However, I have found a website that calms me down: http://www.medcalc.com/growth. I cannot guarantee it will calm you down but it's worth a look. Maybe keeping busy with all the charts can take your mind off worrying about whatever your baby is or isn't doing.

Baby Vaccinations

Today I took Caitlyn to the doctor for her 4 months vaccinations.

I never thought much about vaccinations, other than they have to be done.

A while ago, I was talking to a few of Dan's relatives and vaccinations were brought to me in a very controversial light. I never realised all the fuss surrounding them.

As soon as I got home, I did what any other modern parent would do. I googled.

I found that there were some studies that apparently showed horrible side effects. However, these studies were apparenly not conclusive. After reading many articles, I have come to realise that the possible effects of vaccinations do not even closely outweigh the benefits of being immunised against the diseases.